~The Great Hair Fiasco~

#EpicFail #WaxOn #WaxNotComingOff

~A bit of background… My sister is 10 years younger than me and has always been very independent, so her asking for any kind of help is a rare, but memorable experience. This was an email exchange between us that still cracks me up!~

Big Sister,

The lengths that women will go to get rid of hair simply astounds me.

Since the weather will presumably get nicer in Boston and since I have

difficulties with my underarm hair, I figured I’d go the waxing route. I

went to my local CVS (a Walgreens of sorts that are on every other block

in Boston) and found what I thought to be the best at-home waxing kit on

the shelf. It seemed simple enough but oh no. It was not. To make a

long, awful story short, the wax ended up all over my body while trying to

apply it to my left armpit. When actually applied and then yanked off,

only a little strip of wax and hair came off. The rest stayed on!! I

couldn’t believe it. It started to kind of dry and I had to keep my arm

up so that my armpit wouldn’t glue itself together. I ran to the bathroom

and tried to furiously scrub it off with my loofah and soap. It worked

somewhat but now there’s some remnants of wax on my favorite loofah.

Damn… Oh, and I spilled half the bottle of wax on my bedroom floor as I

was scrambling around trying to get more paper strip thingys in an attempt

to get the hair and/or wax off. So there was a big pile of purple goo on

my floor that I swore would never come off. Luckily, I have hardwood

floors. So after endless scrubbing and not really getting anywhere, even

after trying to shave off the hair and wax, which was actually kind of

painful, I found the little bottle of oil for after-wax treatment.

Amazingly, that stuff took most of the wax right off, as well as the crud

on my floor. And the oils actually seem to have been good for my hardwood

floor because that section looks really shiny and nice now. (NOT that I’m

saying it was worth all this to buffer my floor.) Anyway, my armpit still

feels slightly sticky-ish and I was wondering if you might now what it

best for after-wax treatments. I don’t want to put lotion or moisturizer

on it because I think that would probably sting. Tomorrow, I’m going to

try to shave the rest of the hair and that will probably be the best for

eliminating the lingering sticky situation. Oy. And all just because I

want to wear sleeveless tops. Life should not be this messy.


Little Sister


Ok LiL SiS~

You really need to put warning labels on email like this… pop coming

through my nose onto my computer screen isn’t attractive at all. You

think your pits burn, imagine my nose hairs. OK.. now onto the serious

stuff my sticky pitted sibling… use mayo…not miracle whip… oh no

miracle whip is NOT a miracle for wax mishaps. Straight ole mayonnaise.

Vegetable Oil will work too. Put it on a paper towel… A LOT of it,

not just a Weight Watchers helping, smear it up really good, it will

take all the excess wax off, take the stickiness away and moisten the

skin from the trauma of yanking the 2 pit hairs that came off. Repeat

the mayo, oil if necessary get the sticky feeling gone, but more than

likely this will take it off right away. Then of course shower to get

the smell off you, but don’t use a loofah or anything to rub the pit

area, put a little soap(non perfumed would be best, unless you like to

scream in pain from the stinging) then pat dry…. what made it sticky

was trying to scrub it off, always pat, and maybe this warning should have come at

an earlier date, but never wax alone, you cant pull your skin taunt

enough for it to pull the hair off. Also, how much did the home stuff

cost? You can go to any body waxing place and get it done for 10 bucks.

I even looked at some of it online in Boston and the most expensive one

was only $15.00 and that was for pits and eyebrows. And you may want to

invest in a new loofah, the wax will never come off of it and can trap

bacteria from the wax big time. Unless you are emotionally attached to

it, I would put it to rest in the trash can (right next to the rest of

the wax I am sure) You will have to let me know how that turned out.

But seriously, I have had my crotch waxed and mayo works wonders.


Your Older & More Experienced Sister


Oh Wise Sibling,

Hey, thanks for the tips. Sadly, I don’t own mayo. After Dad’s food

poisoning bout with it, I’ve used “Nayonaise” which don’t have egg product

and is made with soy instead. And no, it doesn’t have vegetable oil

either. But I think my roomies may have some in the fridge. I’ll

probably throw the loofah away within this week. It’s just so cool

though. It has a duck or something on top of it that is great to hold on

to. Anyway…

The wax jazz was $8, which seemed like a good deal at the time because I

could have theoretically used it like 20 times. But yes, I know I can get

it professionally done. I think I’ll try that actually. I was just

idealistic and wanted to take charge for myself. Hey, we were all young

and naive once! About waxing down there, how does that work? Is it like

going into a gynecologists office or something? What’s the level of

privacy on that kind of operation??

As for your nose hairs, I’ve got nothin’. Time is the only answer to heal

that pain. I just hope it wasn’t Dr Pepper – that stuff stings.

Thanks again for your elder sibling wisdom. Maybe someday I can supply my

nieces with such tidbits, but it’s very doubtful. I’ll probably still be

a mess.


Your Sticky-ish Sibling


#WaxOn #WaxOff #SiblingAdvice #HotMess

#EPIC #BigSister #LiLSister
#EpicFail #AdviceNeeded